While sitting at my computer
on October 19, 2009 in Random Funny
While sitting at my computer, I found the urge to reseat myself in a more comfortable position. This required me to pull my chair out a bit where I saw a delicious oreo cookie on the floor under my desk. I knew the cookie had been there from a day or two before, but I felt the 5 second rule didn’t apply to oreos. And I was right. While a little bit soft (not the traditional crispiness a new oreo has), the floor oreo still had all of the delicious goodness you would expect from a floor oreo, and more. I fear to tell this to anyone for surely ridicule and disgust will ensue, but I somehow feel your kind and cookie loving heart will know to forgive me.
In closing, you love cookies too and would also not hesitate to eat the 2 day floor oreo.
Call for Recipe
on October 10, 2009 in Random Funny
We’re looking for the BEST recipe for peanut butter and jelly. If you know any good recipes, just contact us. We’d like you to focus more on ingredients than anything. Thanks!
INFORMATIVE POST: Magic Mushrooms
on October 9, 2009 in Random Funny
A lot of people don’t realize that drug dealers have been scamming customers for a long, long time. ALMOST ALL MUSHROOMS found in the wild have hallucinagenic properties, and are 100% edible as magic mushrooms. ALL brown, white, tan, and speckled mushrooms in the United States can be soaked in water for about 2 hours and eaten, and some time (MOST TIMES) the trip is better then any bullshit you buy from a dealer. the water MUST be drank following the eating of said shrooms. enjoy your new info, /b/. never buy shrooms from a scumbag again.
What do you do?
on October 8, 2009 in Random Funny
You wake up. You are on a massive throne connected to countless cables and tubes, all stuck in you. Around you are a bunch of big guys with armor, tech spears, and pointy hats, none of whom have noticed you are awake. You don’t have much of a memory, but you’re pretty sure the last thing you did was sacrifice the last bit of your power to kill your favored son-turned-evil.
You have a mighty urge to take a piss.
What do you do?
STFU you idiots
on October 7, 2009 in Life's Annoyances
I would really enjoy slapping the fuck out of every person who thinks any of the following:
- jesus is coming back
- obama might be the antichrist
- socialized medicine leads to the gov’t taking away our freedom
- capitalism is good for america
- rod b never did anything good for illinois
- abortion is wrong
- drugs are bad
- every woman should have at least one child
- dogs are smarter than cats
- nickelback is the best band ever, and/or
- “I love that ‘rock star’ song”
Every Single Steve Wilkos Show
on October 6, 2009 in Popular Culture, Random Funny
Dinosaurs are pretty radical. (yes radical, long for rad)
on October 5, 2009 in Random Funny
Even though dinosaurs are fictitious, dinosaur toys are still fun to play with.
Think lions and tigers are scary? Wait until my Tyrannosaurus Rad comes in and bites of their heads.
Office Prank
on September 30, 2009 in Random Funny
Prank: put a funny ringtone on your friend’s phone, hide his/her phone, and then call it.
Ok here’s the setup.
This website has ringtones freely available to download. Following are some ringtones that we hand picked for awesome.
- Benny Hill Theme
- Woman Orgasm
- Donald Duck Orgasm
- Hot ‘n Cold by Katy Perry
- Wall E
- A-Team Theme
- We Be Steady Mobbin by Lil’ Wayne (the whiter your friend, the better)
- That’s Not My Name by The Ting Tings
- Indian Guy’s Voice
- Sex and The City Theme (the more manly your friend is, the better)
- F1 Ferrari Sounds
- Yup Yup Yup Brrrrrriiiiiinnng by Sesame Street
- Kitt Scanner Sound (Knight Ridder)
- MOST ANNOYING ALARM
- Ice Ice Timmy
- Hamster Dance
- Baby Laughing
- Emergency Vehicle Sirens
- I’m an Asshole by Dennis Leary (appropriate wouldn’t you say?)
- South Park “Fuck”
- Jizz in My Pants by The Lonely Island
Download one of these ringtones to your computer and email it as an attachment to your cell phone. (instructions below) You’ll receive a text message with the ringtone attached.
Now, when one of your buddies is away from his phone, send him the text message and open it up with his phone. You should be able to quickly figure out how to open the text and save the attachment as a ringtone. Most phones have this option and it’s relatively easy to figure out.
Erase said message and hide your friend’s phone in his desk somewhere and call him. Hilarity will ensue. Or you’ll get fired, which is still funny.
Email ringtones to your cell phone using one of the following addresses.
Verizon YOUR_NUMBER@vzwpix.com
ATT&T YOUR_NUMBER@mobile.att.net
T-Mobile YOUR_NUMBER@tmomail.net
Alltel YOUR_NUMBER@message.alltel.com
Others, contact your provider for details.
NOTE, don’t use their service that sends the ringtone directly to your phone. It’s not free.
Hey Lakers, good luck with that.
on September 29, 2009 in Popular Culture, Sports
Ron Artest – Workout HOTT Official Music Video 2009
Considering the last thing he did
on September 26, 2009 in Popular Culture, Random Funny
Considering the last thing he did got him nailed to the cross, I’m really not concerned with WWJD.